As parents, we face the challenge of helping our children declutter and let go of everything from toys and clothes to art and old school projects.
While we might see removing these items as a necessary step to creating peaceful homes, it can be really hard for our children to detach from their items. There are, however, thoughtful approaches and strategies that will guide your children into building healthy decluttering habits.
Kids Follow by Example
Just FYI
Many parents realize the power of example when our little ones repeat a swear word they catch us saying (oops!). The same goes for letting go of belongings. When our children see us parting with our own items, and when we explain to them why we are doing so, it sets an extremely powerful example—this is a great step to help children start letting go of their own items. On the contrary, if we expect our kids to let go of their items, but they don't see us parting with any items of our own, it might make letting go a more difficult emotional journey for them.
Involve Them in Every Step
Let them practice making decisions.
Give your kids a sense of control by letting them make decisions about what to part with.
Some guiding questions you could ask are:
- When is the last time you used/played with this?
- Is there another toy that you like better?
- Can you pick out five toys (or pieces of artwork, clothing, etc.) that are the most special to you?
Describing to your kids where their donated items are going (or letting them choose!) is also key. Make sure that they understand that their books and toys will be going to other children, and that their gently used items will bring other children great joy! Some kids shows, like Bluey (Season 2 Episode 38), have great episodes on the importance of donation to help children get excited about donating.
Set Boundaries
Your kids will take these practices to heart.
When decluttering and donating systems are created in your home, these practices don't involve much thought; you and your kids both know that this is simply a routine that they follow, and this makes it much easier for kids. Physical boundaries are a game-changer for creating these systems and building habits. For example, if there is only one box in their room for books, any book that does not fit in the box has to go, and they have the choice of which books to donate so all of the books fit in the box. If their stuffed animals are stored in a stuffie hammock, that is the space that they have for stuffed animals—no more, no less... if one doesn't fit, one has to go. Creating physical boundaries makes it easier for everyone to stay organized and prevents your kids from being shocked when it's time for them to part with some of their toys. It's a system that your kids will expect and hopefully carry with them throughout their lives.
Final Thoughts
Letting go is an emotional process for everyone.
And, for kids, it's even more emotional, since they don't yet have the critical thinking skills to fully understand the benefits and why it might be necessary. When encouraging your kids to part with some of their toys, old clothing, etc., remember to be patient, acknowledge their emotions, and celebrate them when they do make the choice to let go of their belongings.
⚡⚡ Pro-tips
Model Letting Go: Show your children how you declutter your own items. Explain why you’re letting go and how it feels, reinforcing that it’s okay to part with things.
Make Decluttering Fun: Turn decluttering into a game by setting timers, creating challenges like “find five toys to donate,” or using stickers as rewards for each item they let go.
Use Storytelling: Share stories about how their donated items will bring joy to other kids. Relating the process to their favorite characters (like Bluey) can help them feel more excited about donating.
Create Consistent Routines: Make decluttering part of your regular routine. This consistency helps kids understand that decluttering is a normal, ongoing process, not a one-time event.
Encourage Decision-Making: Empower your kids by letting them make choices. Ask guiding questions to help them decide what to keep and what to let go of.
Celebrate Progress: Praise your child’s efforts, no matter how small. Positive reinforcement encourages them to continue making good decisions.
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"Letting go of clutter isn’t just about making space in your home—it’s about creating emotional freedom. When someone we trust gives us permission to release what no longer serves us, we gain the confidence to let go and embrace the present. It’s not just about organizing; it’s about reclaiming your life, one decision at a time." —Megan Golightly
Step-by-Step Guide to Helping Kids Declutter
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Lead by Example:
- Start by decluttering your own items in front of your children.
- Narrate your thought process: why you’re letting go and what the benefits are.
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Set Up a Decluttering Session:
- Choose a small area to start, like a toy bin or a drawer.
- Keep the session short to maintain your child’s attention.
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Ask Guiding Questions:
- Use questions like “When did you last play with this?” or “Can you choose your favorite three toys?”
- Encourage them to think about why they want to keep something.
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Create Physical Boundaries:
- Use boxes, baskets, or shelves with set limits. For example, “Only what fits in this box stays.”
- Let your child choose what stays within those boundaries.
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Explain the Donation Process:
- Talk about where their items will go and who might benefit from them.
- Let them decide where to donate if possible, adding a sense of ownership to the process.
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Celebrate and Reflect:
- Acknowledge their feelings and celebrate their choices.
- Reflect on how the decluttered space feels now compared to before.
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Maintain the Decluttering Habit:
- Set up a regular time each month or season to review items together.
- Keep the experience positive and low-pressure to build lasting habits.
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Megan Golightly, Professional Organizer and Founder of Simplifed
Known for her popular Instagram handle @gosimplified, Megan Golightly has been inspiring people to declutter, organize, and simplify their lives since 2008. Megan and her dedicated team tackle organizing projects of all sizes, transforming homes and empowering families along the way. With a background in psychology and a keen interest in neuroscience, her innovative tips, practical guides, and impressive before-and-after transformations have captivated an online community of hundreds of thousands of followers, all eager to embrace a simpler, more organized life.
